Sunday, December 28
I see a fly on the wall in the winter, and it makes me remember. And that remembering leads me to letting the last pieces of an old story go from deep within my soul. I awaken from this only to recognize while I look in the mirror, that I am so much more than any old stories affirm, I am so much more than the magic of what once was or what once could be, and I am set free to fly in any direction my heart desires.
I am the humming bird.
We don't always consciously know those last little bits of things we hold onto to keep ourselves playing a smaller mediocre game. Oh but when we wake up from it, we always wake up into freedom!
Friday, December 12
It's time to play catch up again. Are we Here Now? It's time to brush up on your spiritual standards, invoke that long held knowledge, and turn your attention from the distractions you've been filling your mind with. Polish up on what you present to represent, so that when the questions are asked you're primed and prepared to lead the ready minds and sleeping minds into the terrains of the new age.
You have to raise the bar of your own expressiveness, bring the passion to the tip of your tongue, and spread the gospel of the awakened mind like that was all you were created to do. Nothing less will satisfy your soul. Drop the rhetoric and feel for the real of what you're here to express. Something that's your own. Something that's beyond a superficial recitation of something you heard somewhere else. What do you know in your heart to be true that isn't knowledge you picked up from someone else? Something you thought up when you were sitting at your kitchen table when looking into your bowl of breakfast concoctions.
Be your most unique original self. Be the self that transcends the images you are supposed to represent. Be that something other that's indefinable and magnetic. Be the true you. Always be that you. For to be anything less than that is to diminish the life force of your whole expressive nature.
You are more.
Friday, December 5
Today's win is my phone upgrade!
I've been looking at my Samsung Galaxy ACE trying to decide what to upgrade to this past week because that phone has had it's time and I was due to operate something a little more 2014, now that you know...2014 is almost over.
I marked it down on my Intention List just this morning.
As in...I'll find the perfect phone and upgrade offer when it's the right time. I do this with just about everything I want to bring into my world - it's much more relaxing and fun to let events orchestrate and organize and bring you the best of the best. So I added it to my list.
And then I moved on.
I took a nap, then got up to go shop for groceries and such. That's all I planned on going for. Groceries. Nothing else. It wasn't even in the realm of ideas for me to pick up a new phone today. It was a "will get the phone in a few weeks or months" kind of idea when I penned it into my Intention List.
I somehow found myself in the aisle where the electronics are.
Enter Carlos! The friendliest nicest cutest phone person ever! I told him I was just looking at phones 'cause I'd been thinking about upgrading. Well, he ended up upgrading me for free AND throwing in $100 gift card without needing to lock into any plans of any kind.
Yep! I kept giggling to myself and just high-fiving the Universe.
Well played, magical land of magical things. Well, played!
So I have my new phone and I've been giggling over it nonstop for the past 4 hours.
Thursday, December 4
Saturday, November 1
The best moments are the one's that you never have to hold on tightly to. They come, freely, exploring you, showing you their cold hands while you show them theirs, hand to neck, mine to belly - and they take you to places you never thought to visit.
Like a rooftop in some city, sitting high in the sky, in the night lighted only by the light that beams from your eyes. Privacy and reunions that span different lifetimes, all unfolding a beautiful story of recognition and day dreams.
When night dreams feel like this, you know to high five an angel somewhere. It's almost 3AM. Time to return to the sheets.
Tuesday, September 23
Some days I wake up while riding the wave
of some epiphany that's decided to accompany me into the waking realm. I love starting my days like that.
It's like sometime in the middle of the night, my psyche decides to shed some story of some kind and I wake up riding the burst of energy that's unleashed anytime we do that. It amazes me. Anytime I wake up with an insight or a changed mind or a realization that something wasn't what I thought it was…I'm amazed because most of the time it's around things I've forgotten about or think I've moved on from.
Last night was one of those nights. In fact, I think the past four days have had some semblance of that in them to varying degrees.
To whatever parts of me do the work while my conscious self sleeps, I thank you!
Monday, September 22
Grease streaked faded blue jeans falling to your hips
Work-boots that leave a footprint
every damn place you go
And I don't mind it at all
'Cause the way the sunlight hits your face
Lights the little spikes lining your jaw
Blue eyes lined in brown eyelashes
And all I'm thinking is, Oh My God
How did I get to this moment
Of watching a thing so bright
Resting next to me in cowboy gear
Setting my heart on fire
You're the story in my pages
The heartbeat of all my dreams
You're the pulse of every desire
My one and only for all my years
Monday, September 8
Tuesday, August 26
Patience, Order, Discipline
A person with an ant totem is active,
community-minded who sees future needs.
You are a planner
but content to build your dreams slowly over time.
You are content in knowing that everything will come to you in time.
The ant teaches you how to become the architect of your life.
The greatest success comes with persistence.
The ant shows you how to work with others.
Ask yourself if you are making things harder than they need to be.
Are you being patient with your own and others' efforts?
Using discipline, you can lay a foundation for success.
The ant is the promise of success through effort.
Sunday, August 24
The thoughts we think are choices we make. The decisions we act out are thoughts that we own. We cannot escape our abilities to author ourselves in every moment of every day. Life has no aims of limiting us or confining us or subjecting us to events or circumstances that we ourselves haven't written into our story. We are powered eternally from inside ourselves. Whether we succeed or soar or whether we flail and fall, it is we who instruct our legs to carry us as wings or to give out under us. Life is unconditionally supportive of what we do and who we become by our own doing.
Tuesday, August 5
For where we are in the world, one of the clearest standards anyone involved in self-work must set, is the standard of not blending in. If your work is to be clear, to be transparent, to be loving, to be open, to be expansive, then blending into any group standard (at this point in our evolution) means blending into separation mindsets, fragmentary standards, mentalities of "us vs. them" and a wide spectrum of perspectives that fall in the separation continuum.
To follow such a collective standard is to lead yourself out of the very Heart you work daily to keep yourself centered in. Being in the Heart, being in the awareness of the Still Center that pulses within all, is being in Love, being in the consciousness where difference and distance, lack and incompleteness, cease to exist. In the Heart all is whole. In the Heart all are the shining brilliance of the Infinite.
Let your incantation be: I will not blend in here. I will not mute the brilliance of being grounded in expansiveness by agreeing to group standards that require I see things as separate, as fragmented, as lacking, as incomplete. I commit to the sight of wholeness and love. I commit to the seeing and noticing of the love essence that is in all, and that shines in all. I bow my head to the sacred before me. I refuse to participate in the drama of separation. I choose to stand fully in the light of connection, grounded in the recognition that all that is before me and around me could only ever be Love in its Infinite Forms. Only Love is, and that is the only standard of sight I will be lead by, I will lead by, and that I will follow.
Don't blend...and don't follow...anything other than the godly Light and shining wisdom of your Heart.
Friday, August 1
One of the greatest gifts of spiritual inquiry, of going inward and committing to a lifelong journey of self unraveling is that you enter a space where everything can't help but be completely transparent. Transparency in life, in your being, in your every endeavor is a valuable currency - a way to exchange a clearer current of life with your heart and with your surrounding. If you're willing to go inward daily and ask: who am I being? What standard of ideals am I expressing? How true am I being to my heart, to my soul? - then you are living your life with a level of authenticity and clarity that will keep you shining like a bright beacon in a field of darkness.
I again and again have been coming across what happens when things are kept hidden, overlooked, buried, unexplored, and ignored. When that is your strategy in life or in work or in any place in this game of being human, somewhere in your timeline will be a cracking point, a point in which instead of willingly processing and having things inside of you come out in the open for processing and clearing and cleansing and refreshing, you'll be forced by your inner forces to crack open from the inside out. Where everything you had pocketed, side-stepped from processing, or suppressed forces itself out of you and in plain sight playing itself out in your mind, in your relationships, and in every context of your waking life.
There's two ways to live life - one is to willingly go inside yourself and do some internal house-keeping on a regular basis. The other is to ignore and avoid, until you're forced into some sort of confrontation where the forces you had been collecting inside yourself come head to head and battle it out not only in your psyche but through the relationships you have and the environments you are a part of. You can evolve and unfold yourself intentionally or you can evolve and unfold yourself through a recurring theme of crisis.
It's been my experience that intentional evolution is much more enjoyable and expansive than crisis evolution, which tends to be shocking and painful to some parts of your being.
The choice of which current to change and transformation you ride, is entirely hours.
Monday, July 28
Sexy Spanish accents wins an already winning presentation!
Wednesday, July 9
Wednesday, July 2
Stop your cop-out.
Don't even get me started on the technology that is the heart.
Wednesday, June 11
Don't even get me started on my issue with the whole "I'm only human" defense. It makes me want to slap a blow up doll. Oh, all the insane things we say to argue for our self-imposed limitations! "Oh but if you only knew the powerhouse of pure power that makes your entire being" I'd shout before pounding my fists into a mountain of silly putty. SPLAT! That's what I'd like to do to that psychological culture of "but I'm only human". Before I go even more into that tangent though, let's come back to the question in the title: Do I believe in God?
Yes. Though, the God I understand and the God that is written about in books and spoken of on the tongues of men are not one and the same. Or more so the God I understand is One that cannot be reached, described, encapsulated by the clucking of our vocal chords. Oh no, when I pray, what I pray to and what I revere is a power greater than my fly-on-the-cosmic-wall of a mind can wrap itself around. When I meditate, what I enter into is a boundless mansion of rapturous energies for which there are no words with the only sounds being deep breath filled sighs as I bathe in something my senses cannot make sense of.
That experience where if even you only allow yourself to taste it and be saturated in it for but a millisecond of your incarnated life, you will never again attempt to describe God to another let alone fight for and rebel against the constructs upon constructs of nonsense we've formed throughout history and will no doubt form for many more days to come.
When someone asks me that question again of "do you believe in God?" My retort is "of what God do you mean?" And as they list the qualities they've read in books written and re-written, received and translated by the tongues and hands of men, I'll answer "Oh, ah, the God I understand is greater still than all that. And still greater than my understanding too."
Thursday, June 5
Saturday, May 31
How fitting, since I've lifted off again, knowingly flying myself into the unknown abyss of majestic creation.
If I could mark all the transition points of my life, that scene between a "fade out" and a "fade in" of a new landscape, they'd be marked with this awareness. First there's this dawning upon of how transient this waking dream of a life is, and then all that once appeared to be solid takes on this transparent form, and fades to black. That point where everything is black, that space between the fames of your reality, that's where you're re-born, that's where your entire existence is remade and rearranged into something new.
I don't know at what level of mind such things are seen but I know they can be seen. On outward appearance everything looks normal, honky dory, status quo. But that change in the angle of the camera that's recording your life is clear as day if you just take yourself out of everyday mind and pay attention to the set design. And this set just changed.
The willingness to leave all that is familiar behind you, all that is now known and solid behind you, that is what fluidly carries you into the new frames of your experience. Change is a ready made dance between you and the infinite unknown. Jump in with both feet readily. You'll find more magic than you could ever imagine that way!
Monday, May 19
When you do what you love, and you love what you do, it organically evolves itself, grows itself in ways you don't see coming. Yay!
Even the things we tell ourselves we are, our endless lists of identities, if we love them from the heart, will wow us as they uniquely grow themselves through us. What you give love to, no matter it's nature or form, will return itself to you in fascinating ways.
Here's to love and loving.
That's what it's all about in the end ~
Wednesday, April 16
The very forces that seem to bind us to something...are those same forces we find both inexplicable and pleasurable as they are experienced through our homosapien space suits.
Sunday, April 6
I think building your life on the foundation of awe and gratitude is the secret of all secrets to living a life you unconditionally love come what may, come any day.
And the really amaze-balls things about it all is that when you do make your core state be awe and gratitude, when you commit yourself to look at life through the lens of awe and gratitude, what comes on any day ends up being things that tickle you and make you light up like Halley's comet in a darkened sky.
I vow to live my life in awe.
I vow to live my life in gratitude.
I vow to the essence of all essences that every day in every way I'll remember the miracle of existing, the miracle of simply being alive in a world that's better and greater than any sci-fi stories can make up.
Tuesday, March 25
God you have to love advertising. Isn't it amazing the things we do with words and the things words do to us?
Anyway, this blog is not about donuts and coffee.
It's actually about the stories we tell ourselves in our mind about time. If you're human, and I'd be stoked to know if a non-human was really reading this, and if you're that non-human please definitely drop me a line and tell me about your extraterrestrial planet...but if you're human, you've likely run some version of this thought in your head: I don't have enough time.
Yep, you know the one. And you've repeated it in your head like a damned mantra. You've sent it out as your silent prayer asking life to reflect back to you all the ways in which "you never have enough time." I wish Will Ferrell was in this blog so he could read everything that's italicized in a sarcastic voice. Oh and he's wearing antlers while he's doing that.
I ran and killed a similar story in my head the other day while washing my face in the morning. I killed it dead because of just how ludicrous it was to catch myself run this pattern. I love debunking the nonsense in my own head - hacking my brain is my favorite pass time.
This particular one about time is a thought we cycle in many different contexts - a meme that's flooded the collective psyche like a virus we catch and re-catch. And the really fascinating thing? We could just as easily say to ourselves: I have so much time and by doing so create the perception and experience that we have all the time in the world to live the quality of life we desire.
Time is totally perceptual - it's not quantifiable in the way we create it to be through our language. When the only place is Here and the only time is Now (really go ahead and try to get out of this moment without using your mind), there's really no such thing as too little or too much time, not enough of or plenty of time. Go ahead and try to give yourself very little time right now in this moment - just for this moment right here give yourself too little time. Now stop that and try and give yourself too much time - just for this moment right here and right now give yourself way way way too much time. Did you do it?
If you slow your mind down and bring yourself into the moment where you notice that all motion is made up in the very mind that tells you there's too much or too little of time, you'll notice that time is always perceptual. All the things you say you have to do or don't have enough time for is a list your mind makes up and then creates a story around. It's only your run-on thoughts that create the illusion that you have or don't have a certain "amount" of time. The question is, can you do the thing you want to do right here and right now? The things you want to do, all of them, can only ever be done in the Now. So why make up a worrisome story about not having any imaginary time for them and stress your nervous system? Hmmmm?
Peculiar, says I.
Whatever perceptual filter we impose on this experience of a rather malleable temporal reality...is completely our own doing. Always.
Do you want to have the feeling and so experience of having all the time in the world? Go on and gift that perception to yourself. You deserve it.
Hack your brain on your own terms. Stop inheriting the memes of your culture when those memes in no way contribute to you loving and reveling in your reality.
Long live the little green men.
Saturday, March 22
To live life on purpose and to live a life of purpose, of service to some cause that feels true for you, seems to pull more life into you. It seems to keep you moving forward. Without it, we seem to just wander aimlessly getting pushed and pulled by the tides of forces that aren't always up to par with your highest and best.
But a mission and destination born from your heart, that will move you in a way that defies everything you think you know and again and again propels you into moments where only your highest and only your best come nose to nose with you.
I'm grateful I asked this question almost a decade ago and the magic-lined answer that came through in most inexplicable ways, has stayed constant this long and stretches itself as the path before me. We ask, life answers. That's the one thing that seems to go uninterrupted by the flux of this shifting world.
I don't know where I've been or where I'm going, but I do know what I'm here for.
And I'll drink mi agua to that!
Monday, February 17
I wonder what winds shifted to make the sail of my sailboat change like this. I welcome it of course. I always do when a Ukulele's involved.
Friday, February 7
When we measure our sense of fulfillment on what we get or don't get in life, we forget the first magical act life ever performed on us - it brought us into existence. Be thrilled you exist, that you're alive, that you woke up today ready to perceive another day unfold itself, another day in which the sun stays magma-hot, the earth spins, water does what it does and oxygen does what it does, and gravity does what it does and on and on it goes.
Be thrilled about all this and see what room is left inside of you for anything other than awe and gratitude.
Wednesday, February 5
Tuesday, January 28
Latenight blogging 101: only blog about weird shit.
Sleepless nights mean only one thing - I tune into the weirdest train of thoughts imaginable to me.
This one isn't so weird as I have a beautiful reference for it. It's that one about feeling like a sibling to a stranger and feeling like a stranger to a sibling. If you can have one, you can have the other. I wonder what it means when you can feel kinship of the soul with someone you have no solid social basis for. I mean they're not someone you talk to or see in your day to day world, and yet this feeling of being of the same soul-blood is just there.
I better get back to the snooze fest. I have to be up and at em in four hours.
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